Meet Jen…

Jen, Breast cancer

What were you diagnosed with, and when?

I was diagnosed with Grade 3, stage 2, Invasive Ductal Carcinoma (breast Cancer) age 36 in October 2013

How did you find out you had cancer?

While running down the stairs at home one day without a bra on – and supporting myself with my hands (ladies you know what I’m talking about!) –  I felt a hard lump deep within my left breast. It was so deep that I found it quite difficult to find again just by feeling and had to be lying down. I kept thinking I was imagining it and almost didn’t go to the GP. Luckily I did. I wasn’t overly concerned and nor was the GP, though she did tell me that she too could feel a lump. Thankfully, although she thought it was probably nothing to worry about due to my age, she made a two-week referral to the breast clinic. Expecting to be screened and then have to go back for results I went alone to the breast clinic – ooops big mistake! I had a mammogram and then an ultrasound. During the ultrasound the radiographer told me that he was 95% certain that the lump in my breast was breast cancer and that he would have to do a needle biopsy to confirm.

What did you think/feel when you were diagnosed?

At the initial appointment I was obviously in shock, having not been expecting to be told anything that day.It was incredibly difficult to tell my husband and mum the news and then we had a week to wait for the official results. In that week I had come to terms with the news and readied myself for the treatment regime that lay ahead.  By this time I felt quite strong and stoic about the whole thing. Facing telling wider family and friends was a challenge, reexperiencing the emotions of the diagnosis all over again through them.

How did the people around you react?

I was very very lucky to have any amazing support network of family and friends both near and far. Although our close families live some distance away, they all travelled to be near us at key times and look after me or our two young children when needed. The whole community in our village supported us: friends helped looking after the children, making us meals and just generally keeping me smiling! Friends that were not so local sent constant messages of support always letting me know they were thinking of me and in their thoughts. A few people found it difficult to know what to say or how to react, but overall I was very lucky and had lots of support.

What treatment did you have?

I had three cycles of FEC chemotherapy (Fluorouracil 5FU, Epirubicin, Cyclophosphamide) and three cycles of Docetaxel chemotherapy. Each cycle was three weeks.  I then had a wide local inciscion (lumpectomy) surgery and sentinal node biopsy (lymph node). Unfortunately, the pathology showed that the tumour edge was too close to the surgical area and so I had a second surgery the following week to remove a little more tissue and this was given the all clear. Following recovery from surgery I had five weeks of daily radiotherapy. I am currently halfway through ten years of tamoxifen therapy – a hormone therapy which blocks the oestrogen in my body as my tumour was oestrogen positive.

How did you feel through treatment?

I had just about every side effect going through chemotherapy, but I had a great oncologist who responded to my symptoms and prescribed things to counteract most ailments. I would definitely advocate reporting everything and anything you are feeling – your team are there to make the treatment as smooth as possible.I felt pretty rough and exhausted by the end of chemo but it is truly incredible how quickly the body recovers.I was apprehensive about surgery as I had barely even been in a hospital before my diagnosis, let alone had an operation, but, despite needing a second op, it was all very straight forward and routine. Radiotherapy was a little daunting and it seemed like such a drag to be going every day but it actually went by quite quickly in the end. My skin became burned in patches but I didn’t have any other side effects at the time.

What happened after treatment finished?

After treatment finished I had originally planned to go straight back to work. However, having attended Shine’s first Great Escape, I chatted to other Shine members and then I reassessed my plans and decided to give myself a bit more time. I’m glad I did. I focused on getting some fitness back and then, much to my mother and husband’s dismay, I did a charity walk around the Isle of Wight! I think I needed to prove that my body was still capable of something……it was hard though! I found work physically much more demanding too and I hurt my back quite badly which made me look to change paths slightly.

How did you get involved with Shine?

I first went to a “new members” meal with the Dorset group early on in my treatment. I was nervous about going and meeting complete strangers but everyone was so friendly. It was great to chat to other people who were around my age and had gone through or were going through similar experiences. I then went on the Great Escape while I was midway through my treatment. I cannot understate how much the weekend changed my viewpoint and the impact that talking with others who had been in my position had.

What difference has Shine made to you?

Being part of Shine has made me feel part of a community through the most horrific experience. Even now, six years on from my diagnosis, if I need to talk about how I am feeling I turn to my Shiny friends for support. It’s not that my ‘muggle’ friends don’t care, it’s just that to them I had cancer and I survived – woohoo, congratulations – they don’t want to hear about the chemical menopause side effects, or my growing PTSD around cannulas or my tamoxifen insomnia! My kids adore Shine too; in fact Shine Camp is perhaps the highlight of their year, so much so that we kind of have to plan our holidays around it now because they look forward to meeting up with their friends at camp! Being part of Shine has made cancer a ‘cool’ club to be part of for them. They understand the seriousness of cancer, of course, but it is not a ‘nasty’ word in our house, it is just something that is part of our lives. They have both been involved in Shine fundraising and both rave about Shine to everyone and anyone who will listen!

How do you feel now about your experiences?

While I would gladly have never had cancer, I am grateful for the gift of being able to see the world through slightly different glasses. I think I have always been a positive person, and I would say I strived to ‘live in the moment’ as the cliche goes. But I truly understand what it means to do that now. By far the biggest change and biggest challenge was accepting that a change had happened – a change in me, and finding and accepting the ‘new normal’, that elusive thing that you only truly understand the meaning of when you get to the end of treatment and go ‘what now?!’ A physical change and a mental change. I think I’m still learning who the new me is now!

If you could give one piece of advice to yourself before your diagnosis & treatment what would it be?

Happiness is what you make it today – not what you plan for tomorrow.