Dating
Dating is complicated at the best of times, and the landscape is ever-changing. Throw cancer into the mix and it could make you resistant to putting yourself out there, cause some awkward conversations, or take things from fun and flirty to serious, pretty quickly. Do I write my cancer diagnosis on my dating profile? When do I tell them about my mastectomy scar? What if they ghost me afterwards?
From first dates, to sex and intimacy, it can feel like the ‘rules’ of dating are constantly changing and sharing your experiences can feel overwhelming. But as with any social situation, you get to make the decision on how, why and when you tell your story.
Stripping it back, dating is an opportunity to meet new people and see whether you have a connection. Why shouldn’t you have fun?! Everyone has their own stories to tell and whether you bare all ahead of your first date or wait for date five, the reaction you get to your story can help to confirm whether you’ve met Mr or Ms Right.
On the positive side, cancer may help you to reassess what you are looking for, to challenge new dates, and to take opportunities you may have passed up before. You are likely to have changed since your diagnosis, and this can add a new dimension to what you want from life and who you want to share it with. Just don’t feel pressured to do anything, wait until you feel good physically and mentally, and try to enjoy it.
We don’t have all the answers, but join our Dating after Cancer Facebook group to chat with people in similar situations. You can also listen to our podcast as we talk about the good, the bad and the ugly of dating after cancer.